Standard 12

Human Systems

Viewing myself and everything around me as integral parts of multiple systems has been one of the most fundamental parts of my path through this program. Every person, relationship, group, family, organization, community and society is interconnected. Much, much more than the sum of their parts. The “and” in between relationships is the most valuable place for learning, understanding, and change.
I enthusiastically embrace the connectedness of people and I began my journey of articulating and integrating systems thinking through some writing near the beginning of the program. (Appendix E) At this time, I was very raw, curious, and naive about the path I was to starting to travel while considering my sexuality and other parts of myself. I applied systems thinking to myself and my place in the world with total commitment. I completed a project in which I made a metaphor for myself as a cookie. (Appendix F) This paints a very clear picture of both my understanding of systems, their interconnectedness and how they affect(ed) me as an individual.
A bit later, I enjoyed working in a small group to and wrote a joint paper (Appendix G) that demonstrates well, my gained skills in said systems as well as many vital skills for communication and working with people. I considered the profound learning I’d experienced in writing more in depth within the same quarter. (Appendix H) This paper in particular talks about my personal life self-led journey of enlightenment with somewhat vague detail. I was beginning to see the “and” part of me, and I couldn’t ignore it anymore. There was me, and there was so much more. I felt as if I were boiling and holding the lid on tight. At times I was so completely consumed with my life, myself, unknowing who I really was and more afraid than I’d ever been. I was afraid and in complete denial of my own identity. I was so very uncomfortable sitting still with myself. I was on the verge of monumental change in my life, my spirit and every single aspect of myself. Yet, I was still so dangerously still with it all. Paralyzed by fear that the life I’d built with my husband was not the one my body, my spirit, needed to be truly happy.
One year later, academically, I found myself writing a short reflection on thinking about community and communities as clients. (Appendix I) The transition from all the interpersonal and personal learning from the first year of classes to the broader picture of communities and global issues, etc. in the second year was a huge and very uncomfortable change for me. I was still in such a vulnerable position in my life and in my heart after nearly completely transforming myself and my personal life, that taking a larger view of anything was, well, just not as captivating. Instead of completely integrating my academic learning and my personal learning like I’d been able to do with the programs first year content, I was feeling more disconnected from my schoolwork. My last three quarters of the program, however, was still speckled with times of clarity. Those times where I was able to plug into my academic learning about larger systems, while somewhat sporadic, was sufficient to integrate the systems knowledge into my Human Service skills and abilities. My paid internship came at a perfect time in my path of learning. I was hired for a position which in which my job description was to maintain and perpetuate a community oriented youth leadership program during the quarters in which I was learning the most about community systems and programs. My experiences in this job demonstrated, unequivocally, the ways in which communities exist and how individuals within them perpetuate change and cumulatively contribute to the strengths and weaknesses of those communities.